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What is the force that binds the stars, I wore this mask to hide my scars

December 16th, 2008

(no subject) @ 08:31 pm

Oh rapture, I'm done with my semester!  And I couldn't care less about it!  I honestly don't know how I did on my finals (so not used to "formally ending the semester by sitting down and taking some ginormous test"). 

I need to find a recipe to make for my (chinese) mom's Christmas Eve Italian Seafood Dinner.  First line of defense would be to find out what everyone ELSE is making.  There's gonna be the regular dishes ("crab" dip w/crackers and cocktail sauce to start, seafood salad, and assorted breads from Mazzola that make my mom retch).  I think my aunt is making stuffed mushrooms (Stuffed with...?) and my cousin is making a dessert.  I'll probably make some sort of vegetable dish...this sucks since I'm a baker (i.e. Im a shitty cook), but maybe it'll be fun and challenging...or maybe just challenging.  I just don't even know where to begin.  Meh.  I'll find something I guess.

Joy.  I don't have class until January 5th.  Need to actually talk to my boss about rearranging my schedule...I don't think shell be happy (is she ever?).  Though to be FAIR, it frees up to their advantage, since I can work more hours for them.  I've been making bupkis this semester, I need to be ballin.

November 28th, 2008

(no subject) @ 11:39 am

Here's an insight as to how I've been spending my time at least 3 days this past week:

Last night, when I came home, the 6 train pulled into Brooklyn Bridge (first/last stop) on the downtown platform.  I looked across the platform at the 6 on the uptown side and went, "Oh huh.  The 4.12 train is still here."  I only know this because the 4.12 train is the train I normally take uptown when I'm going to work for 5am merch.

Kind of fucked, but funny at the same time, in a deluded kind of way.

November 27th, 2008

(no subject) @ 12:34 pm

Best idea ever.  Why have I not done this yet in my life?


November 24th, 2008

(no subject) @ 01:45 am


Ahh. This makes me chuckle a little.  It's good to know that some people have a sense of humor, and all people aren't throwing crap around and pressing charges left and right for every stupid little thing that crops up.

November 23rd, 2008

(no subject) @ 12:55 am

Finally went to the brand spankin' new Victoria's Secret across the street from my job that JUST opened about a week ago.  It's a beautiful store, but kind of a letdown, as it seems VERY exclusive and expensive - it's two levels (at least), the lower level has their fragrances and some lingerie, but it's a very limited selection of outside, european lines (i.e. $78 for a thong, $150 for a bra).  The sign for the upstairs said that the second level was for personal shoppers and custom fittings, and god knows I wasn't going there.  I don't even fit their bras anymore, which kind of makes me sad.  I mean dammit, I just wanted to get some nice, kinda saucy underwear.  Oh well.

November 16th, 2008

(no subject) @ 09:28 pm

Sometimes I get depressed thinking that there's no one out there for me, and no one that I fit perfectly with...like a jigsaw puzzle, for that small but amazing moment when you think you have the right piece, and you place it and it doesn't deftly slip into place.  But you still give it a couple of tries, wiggling it and pushing it down into the groove, even though it's obviously too big or too small, you still try.  After those goes, you finally give up and move onto another piece.

Yeah, that's how I feel alot of the time.

November 15th, 2008

(no subject) @ 11:07 pm

Current Music: Viva La Vida, Coldplay

I have so much to do tomorrow.

Have to go to my parent's house and clean up.  I mean CLEAN UP, since I left it a pigsty and my mother comes back Monday.  The woman will make a comment if a dish is left in the drying rack, or a pair pf pants left (folded!) on the couch, so cleanup time is always super-crunch time for me (her philosophy is "Leave it as you left it", but to the strongest, most conservative way you could expect from a Democrat).

Need to hit the Met to find a piece for my museum report.  I guess I could also just go to metmuseum.org, but that just smacks of high school for me (where I did many an art report by printing out a piece from metmuseum in lieu of actually visiting the damn place.  Hell, I'm pretty sure I did a piece once that wasnt even on display in the actual museum, but was in the online catalogue, and the teacher was somehow ok with it).

Homework due for Monday "Intro to College" class (bullshit, but it determines whether we "pass/fail" the class).  Vet Tech quiz after.  Going out (perhaps) with some guy I met on OkCupid after that.  God, since when do I go out on "dates"?  I dunno if this is even a date.  Whatever.  I have no hope for anything romantically related anymore, and expect nothing.  No to say he's awful (though I don't know so much about him, he seems all right), but he seems like something of a social butterfly.  I don't really get along with social butterflies (i.e. going out every night, always meeting up with people, doing stuff, busy, etc.).  Regardless, we'll see what's up. 

He strangely enough reminds me of an ex-boyfriend of mine.  Into music, but not as much as the ex was.  An enigma - a recognizable measure of shyness, mixed with a bizarre double shot of extroversion at the most bizarre and awkward of social situations.

Looking to go out on Wednesday (my birthday!) with some old coworkers from my previous job.  Haven't seen them in almost a year, and I'll really be able to appreciate hanging out on my birthday with people that aren't my parents...not that I don't love them (I do) and my mom always tries to make it a point to come back to the city in time for my birthday so that I can spend it with her/both my parents if I don't end up having any plans (which has been the case the past few years, I guess I'm just not so popular). 

I feel like something else is coming up that I'm totally forgetting.  Meh, it'll come up.

This will be a busy week ahead.

November 10th, 2008

(no subject) @ 12:19 pm

Ok.  Today is November 10.  If I don't have sex by the time my birthday rolls around (November 19), I'm going to get angry....or rather, angrier than usual.

No, I will not accept this dry spell.  I will not enjoy it, neither will I embrace it.  It fucking sucks.  In clearer terms, the last time I had sex was August 26th.  That is a long....LONG time for me, and not something I take lightly.  I don't care what other people do, and how long other people can wait, the point is, I am slowly going insane.  I tried to think of other times in my life that I went without sex for an extended period, and the only times that comes to mind were (obviously) the gaps between when Jimm and I would see one another, that one three month period in 2006 after I broke up with Jimm, and before I had sex with Michael (that was just over 2 months, but we fooled around during so it didn't strike me as being so desperate).

It is going on two and a half months now.  76 days (YES I COUNTED). 

I will go insane before this week is through.

(no subject) @ 12:02 pm

(no subject) @ 11:20 am

Boourns.  Killing time before class at school.  Smitten with the view outside the window of the lounge area (warehouses + 7 trains rumbling by + a blue, partially clouded sky as far as the eye can see), so I've taken up residence here.  I don't believe I have a quiz today for Intro to Vet Tech (considering she always announces when there's going to be a "surprise pop quiz" the next week), but I feel like she said there was a quiz the week following Part I of the project being due (which would've been last week).

Did my pussy College Intro homework.  Slammed that into the ground.  "Yes I want to be a veterinary technician.  No, I don't think I will be transferring colleges.  Yes, I will be taking specialty course.  No I don't think I will be changing majors.  Again."

On the bus ride over here, I sat by the window.  Caught in traffic, sun on my face.  Everything felt so calm all of a sudden.  But it's almost unsettling, makes me suspicious.  I don't think things are going to remain calm for long...I'm not sure why, it's not necessarily "calm before the storm" type stuff.  More like "calm before the hurricane".  I feel like something spectacular is about to happen, but I just don't know what.  I hope it's good, because this morning I woke up with the feeling of "things can only go up from here". 

What is the force that binds the stars, I wore this mask to hide my scars